The Journey Into Coaching and The Path Of Internal Expression… ( a personal story and why you might step into this realm as well. )
Life, love, adventure and the willingness to struggle and embrace the ease, the grace, and the chaos that is life…
It’s a strange loop of sorts that took me from one exploration to the other, to the uncovering of a curious desire to express all that life has to express in whatever form that may be.
And then to desire that for others to see and experience for themselves, to see what I see and understand, that in a deep way all of our lives are make believe.
There are no rules other than the rules we desire to follow at the moment we desire to follow them.
And when we can see that we have a completely new world to create from.
The freedom to express ourselves and to live as we choose exists as a reality right here right now.
And it was freedom of possibility that turned me on and continues to do so, the freedom to control our direction in life, our attititudes toward it, and the freedom to allow for whatever must be expressed to be expressed.
Thre is nothing more important in my life than freedom and the allowance on my part, to free that expression to come about as it must.
But there are massive challenges that come along with setting your standards high, with taking ownership of your own existence, and with accepting responsibility for everything that comes or doesn’t come.
It forces you to become an expert on yourself.
And that, to the dismay of most, is a life long process that carries on forever.
And most people want to be done growing, so they stop learning, stop expressing their desires and dreams, and they close up and shut down their inner voice.
I do it, have done it, and will contiue to do it too.
My desire for comfort has kept me at times, from living the wonderful life I often desire. It’s just how it goes sometimes.
But I love these obstacles, as these obstacles show, I am called to step up and honor the struggle and transformation.
At a fairly young age I saw for myself the confusion of the adult world. I saw the way people put power down on others in any way they can, unknowingly, most of them do, and most of us allow for it unknowingly as well.
When you see it, it transforms you instantly.
I saw it when I was young. It came from friends, from family, from teachers and coaches, and it came from msyelf as well.
I have never seen the world the same since.
But seeing and understanding are the beginning, and to this day, I have my struggles, and I’ve had my triumphs.
But they’re mine and like sharing your own night time dreams with a friend, it’s your dream and doesn’t have the same sense for them as it does for you; nevertheless it gives us an insight into ourselves and into the other.
And this chapter of my life has become something different than I expected it to be.
For example I made a choice a long time ago that my time was my number one desire to keep and use for myself as I imagined.
So I’ve spent the last 15 years free from working a 9 to 5 job, free from working too much on anything other than what I wanted to be working on, so I spent years meandering around cafes, having conversations with strangers, with friends.
I’ve sat in on many classes at Universities whenever I found a class that inspired.
For fun I did a psychology internship with a professor who was studying near death experiences in terminally ill patients.
Because of this huge amount of free time I was able to spend an entire summer reading Russian Literature while meandering under the clouds of the North West, U.S. all while continuing to pursue my desire to understand and know freedom, self expression, and the nature of reality.
It goes on and on and on. Amazing days, amazing struggles.
And then life shifted and I started to get bored, and so I began exploring whatever else might come, whatever else might inspire.
And for now it became about creating a bundle of money and wealth while doing work that is in alignment with the way I want to experience and play in the world.
And it’s a journey I’m going through right now.
When I was 19, I convinced three of my closest friends, friends who had very little money to each give me all that they had in savings.
I’ve been studying finance and I had chosen a stock that I knew we could make money on. At this time in my life, money and the money I didn’t have was a motivation for me and excited me enough to wake up every morning when the market opened. This was 1994.
They gave me what they had, I had to give it to my father to invest for me, because I didn’t have the right status yet to have my own accounts.
In 3 months we saw a 20% increase and all my friends wanted their money.
That was a glimmer of my mindset.
At some point things shifted and the human condition took over my life, my mind, and my desire to know an explore.
Reality shifted completely and it continues to do so.
When I was about 22 years, I gave up looking at the world in the way I once did.
There are a million different experiences wrapped up in my life, and so what I share here I choose to share out of a particular relevance to where I’m at in life at this time.
So for the last three years I’ve been living out of a backpack, traveling the N.W., a bit in California as well, studying and teaching, exploring consciousness with amazing teachers, immersing myself in the depths of humanness.
I own a beautfiul bicycle, a computer, a vitamix and a few different bits of clothing. I rent rooms and I go on journeys when the journey arrives.
I have conversations with people who want more out of their lives, as I do for myself.
And now I’ve chosen to create something different, a new adventure, to teach and coach, to share what I’ve learned, what I have seen, what I have experienced over that time, wrapping up the psychology, the conversations, and the coaching experiences all of it aimed at being and Expert On Yourself.
It’s been like this for me for a long time, being my own guru is a must. Psychological freedom my great desire and expedition. It’s the conversation I live for and the experience I want to share with others.
And I’m going to let that conversation happen in as many ways as it wants to come, and in all the ways I want to share it, but feel hesitant or shy to do so, I will do it anyways.
My discomfort, my insecurities, my shyness will not win.
Life is the strangest art form I know, a continual stream of creation, of judgements, of conclusions that are continually being destroyed in order to create.
It’s about freedom to be and express our desires and wants, even in the challenge that they are.
We’re born. We die. And somwhere in all of it we build and create a life in some form or another.
And I am creation itself as are you.
